Discipline

Tonight, I had to be a hard-ass. I did not intend this at the beginning of the night, but I knew nearly an hour before it happened that it might be necessary. I have held the title of leader for over a year in one capacity or another, but this is the first time that I've had to truly rebuke someone from that position. (I did once throw someone out of my room for disrespecting my friends and guests, but that was without any real authority.) This was my first case of using authority to discipline someone. What's more, it was for attempting to circumvent or undermine my authority.

I did not like what I had to do. I have suffered such chastisements before (thankfully, no more than words were needed tonight). But I did not feel guilty. I cannot claim that it was the office I held that spoke in my stead, nor would I want to. I was speaking. The effect on me was very real. But such behavior without the authority, and I would feel the need to seek forgiveness. I feel no such need. I was in the right. Even before others confirmed to me that I was in the right, I knew.

For the longest time, I have held the view that the government has the right to do things that citizens do not. Capital punishment is, clearly, not the same thing as murder. Neither is war. But now I can understand in a way of which I had previously been ignorant the way in which these things affect the agents of government. More thoughts on this topic fill my mind, but I do not presume to write these half-formed musings into writing. In fact, I may have already said too much.

Virtues

Some time ago, I came across the Maltese Cross:

This was of no great significance to me, except for the symbolism. The eight external points represent the eight chivalric virtues of Loyalty, Piety, Frankness, Bravery, Glory and Honor, Contempt of Death, Helpfulness to the Poor and Sick, and Respect for the Church. I began thinking of what each of these may mean:

Loyalty: Always remain true and faithful to those who love you and those whom you love.
Piety: Always give first praise and glory to the Lord your God, and worship Him with all your heart.
Frankness: Always speak the truth without balking, even when it is unpleasant to either yourself or the hearer. Neither lie nor hold back, especially in matters of conviction.
Bravery: Never let fear turn you from what you know to be a right course of action.
Glory and Honor: Always give respect and tribute to those who have earned it with right action, justice, and mercy, and ever strive to be worthy of such high compliments yourself
Contempt of Death: Never fear death as a monster, but view it as your enemy with whom you must one day join in battle. Death is brought about by sin, and so must be hated, but is powerless in the face of God, and so must never be feared.
Helpfulness to the Poor and Sick: Always help those whom it is within your power to help, even if this is comprised of no more than pointing them to someone who can better aid them.
Respect for the Church: Always give due respect to the body of believers that constitute the Church. This is not summed up in politeness but by seeking to protect the honor of Christ's bride with openness, integrity, and honesty.

Two things you may notice: these are inherently Christian and Spiritual, and there is no mention of politeness or courtesy. First of all, this is because Chivalry was invented within an inherently Christian system—other honor codes suit well other religions or atheistic traditions. Secondly, being polite—especially to the degree of Political Correctness prevalent in today's society—is not a virtue. To unnecessarily insult someone is not Chivalrous because it denies the virtue of Glory and Honor, but to hold off telling the truth for fear of offense is just as bad.
I am not living by these standards. I'd love it if I were, but I'm not this good yet. Nonetheless, these are my goals for behavior. What are your views on the matter?

Essay Writing

So, my expository writing class will probably be the source of a lot of the things I write here in the near future. On the plus side, the ideas I've been generating for future blogs will be very helpful in choosing essay topics, which I will in turn post here (though not without revision).

I'm beginning to wonder about my motivations for many of the things I do. I won't explore this fully now, but I felt like putting the generic idea out there in the world.